Let Go My Norco

On Friday, January 25, 2013, an advisory panel to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration voted 19 to 10 to recommend moving hydrocodone combination drugs, such as Vicodin, Lortab, and Norco to the schedule II category of controlled substances. If the FDA follows the panel’s recommendation and moves hydrocodone combination drugs from their current schedule III to schedule II, prescribing practices would be more restricted. … [original article here]

Like many of you, I deal with pain on a 24/7 basis. When I am talking, laughing, smiling, or queening out, believe it or not, I am in pain. Here is an inside scope on those who live with pain— we have a high tolerance to it and we are incredibly strong. It is only when the pain is so unbearable that you can see it on our face.

Now each person has their own way of coping with daily pain. Many do the healthy-living (i.e., eating well, doing yoga, etc–check out these great posts). Overall, the majority try to keep themselves occupied so to not focus on the pain. What do I do? I keep my mind busy with some activity (i.e., work, watching some sitcom marathon on some ridiculous network [thank you, CLOO for the 3-day Psych marathon!!]) AND I rely heavily on my drugs, especially my precious Norco (hyrdrocodone/acetaminophen)– the cooler, pot-smoking cousin of Vicodin. Dr. Lupus prescribed a 180-count per month prescription, and I am expected to take one-pill every 4 to 6 hours. But as we all may have experienced, pain is not a uniform symptom. I have good days that I can take my 1-pill every 4 hours. But most likely, I will have days where I am taking 2-3 pills as needed (i.e., whenever I feel like it to keep my sanity). Why? Because- WHEN IN PAIN, I NEED MORE THAN JUST ONE MEASLY PILL TO QUIET THE PAIN. I have been taking Norco for over 3 years now. At first taste, one pill did the trick, but as time went by, I was needing more and more.  Taking hydrocodone is a vicious cycle- because users can form a tolerance towards these opiate drugs, which means you need more of it to have an effect. Personally, I am OK with that. As you read this, you are probably thinking that I have a major dependence on the drug. If you don’t think that, well, keep reading, because if I haven’t convinced you yet… I think I will do a stand-up job in the next couple of paragraphs.

Before I left the office today, I received an email notification that my prescription was ready for pick-up. Just as I was reading it, I smiled, swallowed the last four Norco pills and made a mental note to stop the pharmacy before crashing into my bed. Perfect timing. You see, after 3+ years of experience with the Texas Controlled Substance Act, I have picked-up a few tips and managed to never be without opiates and always with a “comfortable” supply (for those bad days). One day, I will disclose those tips. Unfortunately, during the past month, I had to dip into my “Norco” savings, and by dipping, I mean DIVING IN. I left nothing (oops). So, I was desperately relying on today’s pick-up.

At my neighborhood pharmacy, of which my hard-earned funds go to, I was told “it is too soon” to pick-up my Norco prescription and to “come back on April 4th”. I decided to not panic right away and pleasantly state that there may be a mistake because I was notified via email that my prescription was ready. Now, the following is the dialogue that occurred at the Walgreen’s Pharmacy in Sugar Land, Texas. Because I am so talented, I played the role of the classy diva, sarcastic diva, raving queen, and Diva Licious Jones (my tranny name).

The silly pharmacist continues to speak with me with some stick up her ass: “Did you take more than what you were suppose to?”

Classy Diva: “Fuck yes I did, how else am I able to walk, stand and have this heated conversation with you about my painkillers?”

Crap-pharmacist: “You are allotted 4-6 pills a day for pain”

Sarcastic Diva: “Oh sorry. Let me give that message to my body that is being attacked by its own immune system. I am sure it didn’t get the memo.”

Pharmacist: “The controlled substance law states…”

Raving-Queen: “I am going to stop you there. How about this. Why don’t you go get hit by a truck, or get cancer, or suffer from some painful disease like arthritis or lupus, and then, tell me if you give a damn what the controlled substance law says. It is OK, I will wait.”

Dumb-bitch who still doesn’t get it: “There is no need for that. You are just going to have to come back in 7 days. You will not get your painkillers”

Diva Licious Jones: “That is where you are wrong” [pulls the around-the-world-snap and struts out of Walgreen’s] *side bar- I strutted like a true diva but that shit hurt*

What was my next move. PANIC! First, I called my fellow-lupus warrior to bitch about what had happened and to see if I could bum a few painkillers. Second, I called my long-time buddy-past-lover/druggie to score drugs off the streets. How dare that pharmacist refuse my drugs! She was clueless to say that I would not get them today. I know it is possible to score outside the pharmacy, because the older classy ladies at my infusion clinic speak of this all the time. For fuck-sake, I buy weed from a 68-year-old diva (gotta love the pain-community)! So, I left my sure-thing-slam-dunk-move for last. I called in the same prescription at the Walgreen’s in the neighboring town… AND WON! #Rulesweremadetobebroken.

What is the bottom-line? Am I dependent on opiates? Maybe. Will I do anything to have a steady stash? Hell Yes. Like I said before, each person has their own way of coping with pain. I don’t judge anyone for eating grass, going to acupuncture, smoking pot, drinking pure lemon juice or etc.

Here is your Diva’s Note: I think at this point, fans, we need to do what makes us happy AND feel good. We just have to remember that every action has a consequence. I will smoke a doobie, sprinkle Norco on my ice cream, and drink glasses of vino until I can peacefully pass-out pain-free. We already go through so much that no one would ever understand, so why not make the most of it?

STAY FABULOUS!

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Lupus Treatments: Trial and Error… and Patience

As we all know, there is no one treatment ([n]or cure) for lupus. How many times have you been asked, “So, there is no cure for that?”. OR how about that frustrated question from your love one as you are unable to move out of bed, “Aren’t you suppose to be getting better by now?”  HOW DO YOU RESPOND TO THAT?!? We have all been playing the worst waiting game… Waiting for the right treatment to make us feel an ounce better; Waiting for our quality of life to get back to how it used to be; Waiting to start living our life again.

…Just waiting…

Lupus requires a trial and error of finding the right medication(s) to help you get to that magical state of “remission”… or at least to a state where you do not feel limited. Yesterday, I had my 11th infusion of Benlysta (I will be hitting the one-year mark in December). In addition to my infusion, I had my monthly visit with Dr. Lupus. While I was waiting for him, I was flipping through his collections of throw-away magazines in the room. I grabbed one and stumbled onto a full-spread advertisement for Benlysta. It featured a happy-looking woman enjoying some social time with family and friends with the phrase: “I am fighting lupus with Benlysta.” I chuckled to myself and threw the magazine (in a passive aggressive manner) back onto the pile. I have been on this magical Benlysta for almost a year… and yet I am still waiting for a better outcome. Yes, I have felt better from 2 years ago… but I have had more than my share of lupus flares and hospital visits. Feeling my frustrations, my doctor agreed that  Benlysta-alone was not doing the trick— I have had 2 lupus-related hospital visits in the month of September, become a pill-popper to minimize the pain, and was sitting in front of the man with a temperature of 99.4 degrees. My doctor and I came to a shared decision to a new combination of Benlysta, prednisone and Imuran (azathioprine). This new combo will be sixth attempt to find lupus-relief.

Here is my lupus medication history.

MY TRIAL AND ERROR

Trial #1: Plaquenil (hydroxychloroquine) + Prednisone (duration ~8 months): It takes about 6 months for the effects of this anti-malaria to kick in. Before I can even get this pill in my hands, I had to get an approval from an opthamologist . Why? Because there is small risk (no more than 4% in unmonitored patients) of blindness. Pretty severe adverse effect, eh?

Error: Major muscle weakness. I found myself saying to my doctors, “I feel like my body is too heavy for my legs”.

Trial #2: Methotrexate + Prednisone (duration: ~4 months): I first started by taking the pill-form but had to switch to the injections to alleviate nausea often associated by ingesting the pills.

Error: Respiratory problems, an adverse effect of methotrexate. Saravanan and Kelly (Rheumatology 2006) stated: “As patients become less limited by their joint disease due to treatment, an increasing number report breathlessness as a result of respiratory involvement.” Keep in mind, fans, that I have asthma; so this put me at higher risk.

Trial #3: Benlysta + Prednisone (duration: ~2 months): I have previously talked about my journey with Benlysta. Go ahead… take a look at the past posts.

Error: It was not doing the trick.

Trial #4: Benlysta + Methotrexate + Prednisone (duration: ~3 months): I have talked about this as well. Go ahead… take a look. 🙂

Error: Overall, feeling of still-feeling-shitty and the respiratory problems. I felt like I had the flu. After this, it became very clear that methotrexate was not for me. Oddly enough, after I was taken off of methotrexate, I ended up in the hospital for heart and asthma problems. My pulmonologist explained that methotrexate was giving me some protective factor against asthma, and once I had given it up my air sacs decided to act up!

Trial #5: Back to Benlysta + Prednisone

Error: Still feeling shitty

Trial #6: Benlysta + Prednisone + Imuran

Before taking Imuran, your doc will run a genetic test. This is to determine if Imuran is the right drug for you. Certain risks that are associated with this drug are greater in those who have a specific genetic disorder. Your doctor will perform genetic testing prior to starting therapy to determine your risk.

I will keep you posted on my treatment journey… I am crossing my fingers that I will soon finish this damn “trial and error” phase of lupus.

For more info on lupus treatments, check out these two links from:

Lupus Foundation of America

Mayo Clinic

Stay Fabulous!

Diva-Worthy Song of the Day No. 4

Excuse Me- I am Still Standing

I let lupus get the best of me! AGAIN! I hate to admit this but for the past 3 months, I have been in hiding and nothing, not even a huge bottle of CYMBALTA, could get me out of the dumps. I had lost my DIVA-ATTITUDE! You want to know why? Because, Lupus sucks the big ONE. I am so over this disease. Let me share my tale of terror.

FIRST, I had to come to the following as a 30-something-year-old woman: 1) I can no longer live alone and had to move-in with my parents, 2) I can no longer drive… people of Houston were in danger, 3) I can no longer work a full 50-hour work week, and 4) OPIOID DEPENDENT. If that wasn’t pyschologically-ball-busting enough, my body decided to join the fun. In addition to fighting off daily-minute-by-minute pain, brittle bones, and trying to function with a crappy-central nervous system, I come to realize that my kidneys have thrown in the towel and my ovaries felt the need to funk out (aka premature ovary failure. Now my 60-year-old tia and I can bitch about hot flashes together, and I can gain 5lbs by looking at a cupcake). Soon I will be telling tales of the diva with lupus nephritis. Surprisingly, my liver is still holding on by a string. Apparently, all that training of binge drinking and drug use I put it through during my younger years paid off. On top of that, I have been exhausted and fatigued because my lone-leukocyte from my non-existent immune system (thank you, Benlysta) has been fighting infections left and right, including urine, respiratory and folliculitus (infection of the hair follicles– lame).

Of course, I still had to deal with life. And I may have not done such a great job with dealing with it. I had responsibilities like: going to work, submitting a grant, doing maid-of-honor stuff for my friend (the bride-to-be), and still try to maintain my composure. AND people still wanted me to be social and attend birthday dinners and game night?!?! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! What I really wanted to do was: Tell my boss to go to hell, NOT submit the grant that won’t get funded because of some political reason, tell my friend that I could care LESS about her bachelorette weekend and that she could shove her royal-wedding theme bridal shower (her idea) up her small ass, and crawl into bed with two-handfuls of vicodin and Norco. HOW DARE YOU?!?

WHEW! There you have it fans, I just queened out.

All of this was physically and emotionally exhausting- which induces flares. I am confident that everything will be OK. I trust that I am in good hands with Dr. Lupus and I have tremendous support from my family and my close friends. These are the guys that are always there, even when I feel like shit. They get it. So, why am I sharing this story? I do not share my stories for your sympathy or your “I’m sorry”. Because, I am not sorry. I am grateful for this experience. I am realizing more about myself and others through this process. I am actually lucky.. VERY LUCKY. I am grateful to even be breathing and able to type this out to school my fans. 😉

Take your pen and paper out, fans. Because here is your lesson that you will never forget. If you are able to blink and take a breath, you are STILL STANDING.

I tell myself the following phrase everyday:

I have everything within me to conquer the world.

Now, I may do it at a slower pace, but DAMNIT I will do it. It sounds lame, fans, but we can do it. Do not let lupus (or anyone else) bring you down.

The DIVA is back and this is a turning point in my journey and I am looking forward it.

Stay Fabulous

Beauty is skin deep

“Beauty is skin deep and I am in a sh!#-load of pain” -The Diva

WARNING: This blog is dedicated to the ladies of lupus (sorry dudes).

While getting my infusion of Benlysta, I came across an article on allwomenstalk.com entitled “7 Great Make-up Tips for Ladies Undergoing Chemo…“. It made me think: “I wonder how many fabulous chicas in lupus pain look at themselves in the mirror and say ‘Geez, what has this disease done to me?!'” Maybe you haven’t because you are uber-fabulous, but I am going to be honest (and it may seem vain)… I have said those exact words. There have been moments when I look at myself in the mirror and do not even recognize myself. I know I am awesome but there are times where I cannot deny that my body image (defined as an attitude towards one’s body, especially appearance) is somewhat low. I blame lupus. I know I was NO MODEL pre-lupus but I have always loved my body and appearance. I had the attitude of “I can rock ______”, even if to others I looked like a damn fool.

Lupus and Poor Body Image: It is OK to Admit it

Lupus is a multi-systemic disease that mostly affect young women, and it is disfiguring. So it is no surprise that it may affect physical and emotional health. There are several reasons as to why lupus affects our body image… it’s because it affects how our body is looking! Are you on steroids (i.e., prednisone)? Go look in the mirror right now… is your face looking like the typical full-moon character that Disney usually draws up? Or, chew on this: Why is it that I am losing hair on my head but growing a mustache?! How about gaining 5 pounds within a 2-day span (how is that even possible when I barely can keep my food down from all the nausea)?!?! Do you jiggle? I DO.

Disease manifestations, disease activity, lupus treatment-related damage, comorbidities (i.e., other disease that tag along with lupus- osteoporosis, arthritis, renal failure, etc), and medications may adversely affect body image. Skin rashes, uneven pigmentation, vitiligo, scars, loss of teeth, alopecia (i.e., hair loss), facial hair, stretch marks, weight gain, fatigue, pain, depression, unpredictability of flares, or lack of independence all contribute poor body image in women suffering from lupus. This also can affect our quality of life. Although the literature on body image in lupus is scant and controversial, a recent article adds more evidence that body image in lupus patients is poor. If you would like a copy of this article, please contact me.

Younger patients and those with cutaneous disease activity or damage, or depression are more likely to have poor body image-related quality of life. The bottom line is that poor body image is a realistic problem that patients with lupus frequently face (i.e., I AM NOT ALONE… neither are you), and this needs to be addressed through focused research on these specific issues. Of course, body image-related quality of life can be dealt with through some effective interventions, such as cognitive behavioral therapy with a trained therapist (I have one… more to come on that).

How to Not Look Like You are in Miserable Pain

Back to the allwomenstalk.com article that motivated me to pop in two vicodins and type away. Although it addresses the women on chemotherapy (remember methotrexate is a form of chemotherapy), this article gives some tips on how to keep that healthy glow even though you may feel like crap, and some Do’s and Don’ts to make-up. Don’t hate on it just yet… there is some truth to it, and I think the tips can apply to all of us (regardless of the medications we are taking …keep in mind, lupus alone does some silly sh!# to our body).

Although I feel like crap, I have had some people compliment on my skin. I know it is the new skin regimen I adopted once I started to loss my hair. When I was bald, my face was my new money maker. Yes, my hair is back but I have not abandoned the skin routine. This is what I do (in addition to the cardinal rule of keeping your face clean), it isn’t much but I hope it helps:

1. INVEST IN A MOISTURIZER. My skin started to feel dry once I started taking medications and I looked like I aged soooo fast! I know I am 30, but just because I have lupus I do not need to look like I am 55. I do not use a very heavy moisturizer because I did not want to induce a bigger acne breakout. Not only was my skin super dry, but there are days where my skin was an oily mess, a la puberty-years. There is no reasoning to it. So, I opt to use a gel-cream from Garnier “Moisture Rescue- Refreshing Gel Cream”.  For the really dry days, I use Philosophy “Take a Deep Breath”. This gel-cream is oil-free AND it helps calm those morning red-blotches.

2. JOIN THE BB CREAM TREND. IT IS WORTH IT! BB creams are suddenly everywhere… and there is a reason. BB stands for “Beauty Balm” or “Blemish Balm” depending on the formula, and they’re basically tinted moisturizers with skin care ingredients and SPF built in. The last thing you want to do to disguise the fact that you are feeling like caca is to pile on a bunch of make-up… then you start looking like a woman who looks flu-ridden and should be working a pole. The major plus of a BB cream is that in one bottle you have just the right amount of coverage, moisturizer AND sunscreen. We all know how important sunscreen is to us!! Basically, a BB cream is a tinted moisturizer with a little kick and extra benefits. The tinted moisturizer helps even-out my skin tone, even during those random occasions when the redness and uneven pigmentation conquers my face. My first BB cream was from Garnier, because it was $12.99 and I wanted to see what the big hype was about. Once I joined the bandwagon, I went to Sephora and bought Smashbox’s BB cream. Smashbox is best known for its primers. Their version is fragrance-free (unlike most of the others), so it’s ideal if you’re allergic or sensitive to fragrances. It feels fantastic going on and looks great even at the end of a long, hot Houston day. I can be sweaty but still have a fresh face.

3. BRONZER/BLUSH the Color Back in. This is probably common sense. The use of bronzer will add some glow and life back to your pale skin. A light-hand will give just the right touch of sun-kiss that is needed.

Fans, please don’t forget that despite the weight-gain, hair-loss, and other-body altering stuff that lupus does to us, we will always be fabulous. Why? Because we are strong enough to go through and SURPASS something that the majority cannot even imagine.  And we do it with a smile.

Stay fabulous.

 

To Ink or Not to Ink??

“There are no specific problems that have been associated with tattoos in lupus patients. Keep in mind the small risk of infection with hepatitis B and C. Occasionally lupus patients have been known to have a reaction to the tattoo dye but this is very rare. Remember, if you are on immunosuppressive medication, this may increase the chances of infection and slow healing of the tattoo area. As with other procedures, it is best done when you are in remission or a welled controlled mild disease state. Consult with your physician prior to getting your tattoo.” —Wise words from the Lupus Foundation of America

It was a regular Saturday early evening. I am in the passenger seat of a big, Texas-style truck (the typical ones you see in all Texas-related commercials). Driving the roaring beast was my dear friend and fellow lupus warrior, Vero. We were two runaways sneaking off towards a town southeast of Houston to the thing that lupus patients are not recommended to do. We were on our way to get inked.

My obsessions with tattoos started as a young Jewish, latina– translation it was never (and still not) accepted by los viejos (e.g., elders). It was a big NO-NO. Tattoos were a big “estas loca!” mentality. I had my first tattoo experience in college when I finally had a design in mind and accomplished what I had identified as a “big event”. I survived college (literally.. there were many mornings when I thought “how the f&*# did I get here?!?”).  Anyways, pre-lupus I had accumulated 5 tattoos with no thoughts of stopping.

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TAT #5 on the rib... ouch

Of course, with the diagnosis of lupus I had worries that my so-called “body mutilation” (as my parents and Dr. Lupus call it) days were over… Fast-forward a couple days before that Saturday evening, Vero and I are discussing a lively topic of “things we should do in 2012”. And you guessed it, my dear fans, getting tattoos dedicated to our batte with lupus was on that list! So, on that lovely Saturday evening, we visit the one-and-only man who can ink my body, Mr. Bill Greenman. For our first lupus-dedicated tattoo, Vero and I decided to get butterflies… and we lived through it.

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Vero's Butterfly on upper mid-back (right on the spinal cord!)

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My Butterfly nicely placed under tat #3

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“This is wanted pain. I paid for this pain” – Vero

WANT TO GET A TAT?
What to expect (here is another one of my famous lists):
1. Do not even dare of getting inked if you do not feel your best. In lupus terms, reschedule your session if you are having a bad, lupus day. You know when you are not feeling your best; listen to your body and bow-out gracefully if necessary.  Do not even think of going to get inked on the day of or day after your methotrexate, Benlysta, or other lupus-treatment intake. Take your steriods HOURS before the session. Are you on anticoagulants (i.e., blood thinners)?? Guess what– you will be bleeding a waterfall with one prick… and maybe you should consider on doing something else to express yourself (e.g.., dye your hair, etc).
2. Pain is not that bad- Consider this, you are in pain 24/7 so you are most likely use to the induced-pain. Taking some tylenol, NSAID, or etc obviously helps… see point #4.
3. Eat before going- You are putting your body through some stress when getting inked, therefore, you will need all the nutritional support. Consider on bringing a little treat to the parlor, just in case you feel light-headed during the session. Passing-out during a session can happen to the best of us, so having a little sugar near-by can help you get through that.
4. What about the painkillers? I am not going to avoid this question. We as lupus patients have access to the best painkillers. I am not going to lie to you, dear fans, I popped in a vicodin pre-session. This eased some of the pain of sitting still for a period of time, and of course, the pain associated with getting inked.
5. Inform your tat artist that you have lupus. He may not know what medically means, but tell him that you are a little more sensitive compared to the average-Joe.
6. When the tat artist is about to take a break from your piece, ask him/her to spray it down with some Bactine (it helps soothe the skin a bit while giving you that anti-bacterial proctection).
7. Post-session: FOLLOW ALL CARE INSTRUCTIONS provided by your artist. This is for your protection, as you know, you are more at risk of picking up any kind of infection.
8. Expect heavy bruising as you heal. Remember, fellow lupus warriors, we bruise so eeasily.  Go ahead, look at your legs, I bet you have some kind of bruise from that “bump” you made with the coffee table. Post-tat, my arm looked like it went through some heavy beating, and technically it did.
9. Aquaphor (or something similar) + Bactine (or something similar) are your best friends.
10. Healing will take longer. Keep caring for it as your body heals, it is worth the wait.

*I shouldn’t have to include the following into my above-list: DO NOT GO TO SOME SHADY-ASS, DIRTY TATTOO PARLOR. Just like you check-up on your doctor and medications- DO YOUR RESEARCH BEFORE GETTING INKED! If you go to some shady place, you might as well have gotten your tattoo in prison.

WHY DID WE DO IT?
I don’t want to speak on behalf of my beloved, fellow warrior, Vero, but I wanted to know that I could still get inked. Also, there was a control issue… I wanted, for once, to have control over my pain. Yes, I paid for it $$, and yes, everyone who cares for you will be little upset that you put your body through that stress (i.e., Dr. Lupus gave me the greatest lecture/guilt trip EVER when he found my new work). But, to be honest, there was some feeling of accomplishment when Mr. Greenman was working on my piece. I think often when we are in pain and popping pills to try to silence it, we become frustrated; not only because that damn pain never really goes away, but it reminds of us how lupus can take some control away from us.

Vero and I have continued to express our fight through the art of tattoo. Vero is on the path of getting this amazing wolf tattoo on her lower back (near the kidneys) to express her struggle with kidney failure and the continued fight with lupus nephritis.

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The wolf that attack Vero's kidneys

As for me, I have gone through 3 sessions of a leg tattoo to express my love and hate with lupus. I chose to have the Phoenix depict how I rose from the ashes as a new person with new perspectives with my struggle with lupus.

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Phase 2 of the Phoenix Tat on upper left thigh

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Phase 3 of the Phoenix

Now dear fans, I am not saying you should go out and get inked to show your fight. What I am suggesting is to do what you can to take back some of that control that lupus robbed from you. Want to breathe in the ocean waves? Drive to the beach, lather yourself in sunscreen, wear that floppy hat, sport those designer sunglasses and be that diva sitting underneath the umbrella. Want to share your lupus war stories?  Join your local chapter of a lupus support group (i.e., Lupus Foundation, Lupus Research Institute, etc), start tweeting, or better yet, start a blog.  No one is ever going to know what you are going through, but many can relate and many want to hear your story.

Do you have a tattoo dedicated to your fight with lupus or in memory of someone who is fighting or fought with lupus? Don’t be shy and share the art. 

 I look forward to seeing them.

Be Fabulous!

Posted from the Diva on the road

Painkillers and smiles

If I didn’t need the drugs so badly, I would sale them to you.

As I was popping my pills freely, including my beloved vicodin, among dudes, one asked the common question with a sly smile: “Can I have a vicodin? I will pay anything.” I looked at my white oval pill with such love and desire. I thought to myself, “I could spare one and make a couple of bucks.” But then, I thought of the moral implications- ‘Tis wrong for thee to share prescriptions amongst comrades’– plus, it is apparently illegal (minor detail). I looked at the dude, who was desperately still trying to hold onto his early twenties (and deny his thirties) by wearing a backwards cap, and said with a polite smile, “Fudge No!!!” (Ps I don’t say fudge…). It is then I realize that the Houston’s streets would be safe from my medicine cabinet. Lupus patients would never become drug dealers… we almost enjoy the drugs (i.e. powerful painkillers) too much…. and we can’t live without them!

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Enjoy your prescribed painkiller… maybe sprinkle it over ice cream, cupcakes, be creative. Enjoy that moment of haze, forget why you are even taking it and smile.

Posted from the Diva on the road